‘Captain’s orders, sir. I’m to deliver you to his cabin. Forthwith.’
‘Forthwith? But you only got back at midnight.’
‘I know, but he said it was urgent.’
‘He’s not having trouble finding the rent, is he?’
‘He said to tell you, should you be hesitant, that it’s not just matters regarding The Grange but issues of wider mutual interest. Or something like that.’
‘I know what he means.’
‘You do? I don’t.’
‘Ahoy there!’ I shouted up to a half open first floor window. And when a head appeared; ‘Permission to come aboard?’
‘Escort the prisoner, if you would be so kind Sparkwell.’ Replied the Captain.
We were standing in the garden, having made a discrete entrance avoiding our own security, in view only, of those lounging on the patio enjoying their smoking area. ‘Who the fuck is that?’ I overheard a quiet voice say. ‘Charlotte’s bloke, he’s the money!’ Such was the not so low-key reply.
What had once been the late Admiral’s study was now stuffed with the as yet unorganised contents of the good Captain’s yacht. He could be heard rustling behind a pile of junk almost as tall as he was. ‘Here we go, now then what do you make of that?’ He was holding up a large, old, framed black and white photograph of a wide-open bay turned into a harbour, with a few scattered ships.
‘Scapa Flow. During World War Two, presumably. You want your old name back. You want this, er, shore establishment of yours, to return to being known as Royal Oak?’
‘Leading by a head, as usual. Here, take this, a personal cheque for the rent, from your tenant, for the time being, for this private house, which just happens to have a few guests right now.’
‘With you so far.’
‘Once the right name is back on all the documents you arrange for a very discrete sign, just for the postman’s benefit, couple of inches high, on one of the pillars of the gate, simply saying Royal Oak.’
‘Consider it done.’
‘Now, you and I know that the staff, paid and unpaid, have between them numerous certificated qualifications bestowed upon them by the mental health industry down the years, but we want to be as informal, and to be at arm’s length from local authority health and social care regulation as humanly possible. We don’t want environmental services on our back and most of all, want to stay out of the clutches of the Poor Law Care Quality Commission!’
‘You need a good lawyer.’
‘And you’ve got a building full of them.’
I took out my mobile device. ‘Bernard? Well, it’s not that early. I want you to place the file on The Grange in the hands of your best man on public health and social care, and set up a meeting for the three of us sometime in the next week, low key, a background briefing from yours truly.’
‘Breakfast, gentleman?’ Said Charlie, appearing from nowhere bearing a tray.
‘Coffee and doughnuts! With pink icing!’
‘Addicts breakfast, sugar rush, sorry about that.’ Replied the Captain.
‘So, what news from down the coast?’
‘The quayside is clear, with just the yacht alongside, the modern floating wharfs are beginning to clear, prior to removal.’
‘What’s the word on the dredger?'
‘Chugging along the coast as we speak. The cinque port charities are up in arms about their cosy relationship being broken, but the mining corporation has the money and expertise to go over their heads. It wouldn’t be a problem of course if there were more dredgers around...’
‘But that’s part of the point of it, rough up the Environment Agency a bit, make them realise that the Victorian, industrial-style of inland waterway management for commercial benefit, is the solution to sea level rise and the increased inland flooding from the weather, changes in land use, etcetera.’
‘A deeper, faster flowing river is a cleaner river.’
‘Exactly. Puts sand back on the beaches if you dump it right.’
‘And tourists.’ Chipped in Charlie.
‘And what have you got to report, Tony?’
‘The King has been made aware of the railway project and made encouraging noises, what we need now is for him to hear good news from the naval college. How is that going?’
‘Ongoing negotiations, visits scheduled. But how the King might hear about it I’ve no idea!’
‘It is vital that word should come from the bottom-up, might I suggest the next time you’re alongside the Commodore, or whoever it is, you enquire how they intend to memorialise the involvement of our late Queen and the Duke with the college? I mean, naturally the King would travel to unveil, or cut a ribbon, possibly survey other activities in the environs.’
‘Your world of influence peddling is a total mystery to me; I’ve often asked Charlie to explain.’
‘Ah, now I haven’t given you the final pieces of your end of the jigsaw yet.'
‘When my father was a child, the Great Western used to hand out their own brand of jigsaws to kids on their named trains.’
‘I’ll remember that. We have yet to acquire the station on the other side of the river, but I’m keeping my efforts there on deep background for the moment. What I really should mention though, is the coastal barge.’
‘You want to acquire a Thames barge?’
‘No, I mean a new, smallish, flattish bottomed vessel with battery-powered electric engine and modern sails.’
‘Good lord, I’m not aware of such a thing. What on earth for?’
‘To carry the steam coal from the new covered mine, which is located a mile or so up-stream from the coast and then transport it down the west coast to our quay.’
‘But that’s turning logic on its head!’
‘Somewhat counter intuitive I’ll grant you.’
‘That’s like pre-railway.’ Said Charlie.
‘Precisely. Green and cheap, once it is up and running, but from our point of view carrying a very valuable cargo.’
‘The locals won’t like the handling; the unloading and then moving it to over by the turntable.’ Said the Captain.
‘It will be bagged. Degradable and combustible.’
‘Blimey!’
‘But, has anyone made such a vessel?’
‘Well, almost. The Norwegians now have two electric powered, battery-charged passenger ferries doing the coastal, island hopping, fiord crossing, routes above the Arctic Circle.’
‘Yes, I’ve heard of that, whilst our local university is still pissing around in a little converted river-fishing boat.’
‘And modern sails have been added to small ocean-going ships.’
‘Still, one would imagine the Navy has some involvement, somewhere.’
‘Can you find out?’
‘Maybe. There is also a genuine original “coals from Newcastle” sailing barge in the process of restoration, they’re in desperate need of sponsorship.’
‘I'll pass that on.’
‘You’ve done it again!’ Declared Charlie as I exited the car to open our mews garage doors for her.
‘Done what?
‘Groaned.’
‘What?’
‘Every time you get out of the car these days you make a kind of groaning noise.’
‘Can’t say I’ve noticed, what I have noticed is my joints, or muscles or whatnot are getting stiffer.’
‘Well, attend to it. Otherwise, you’ll draw attention to yourself, people will start thinking you sad and desperate, too old for the car you don’t drive!’
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