‘A text from Mr Mackintosh, sir.’
‘And what does he want?’
‘We’re invited to take morning coffee, this morning, at our old apartment.’
‘Good lord.’
‘He says, he’s had another idea for an annual event.’
‘Well, the second annual Awayday was a roaring success, though I must admit I was sceptical at the time, a guided tour of the old convict colony on the Moor seemed an odd choice, until one realised that one total institution is much like another. The chaps can be awfully sentimental about the old school. So perhaps he deserves a hearing, reply that we’ll be happy to attend.’
‘Very good, sir.’
‘Marietta! Long time no see.’
‘How are you sir?’
‘Oh, mustn’t grumble, and your good self?’
‘Jim keeps me young.’
‘Really! Well, that’s good then.’
‘Isn’t it strange about Mr Brinkley?’
‘Well, he always seems a bit strange to me.’
‘I mean having to talk to him all that way away in Spain, and he’s forever emailing documents.’
‘Sign of the times I’m afraid. And Alistair, he’s behaving himself I trust?’
‘Oh yes. But between you and me, he doesn’t quite have your style.’
‘What ho, Charlie, Tony. Come along in.’
‘Morning Cat.’ I’d not been to the apartment in sometime, what was striking was how much of it still remained unchanged from the days of our occupancy. What we’d left behind was still there, and what we’d taken away seemed to have been replaced with remarkably similar items, apart from the cameras and the high tech of course.
Suddenly the door to the treatment room, formerly known as my spare bedroom, er no, I mean Cat’s spare bedroom, was flung open and out breezed the lady from number forty-two. ‘Good morning! Coffee everyone?’
‘Er, thank you.’ I responded.
‘Charlotte?’
‘Yes, please.’
‘Thank you, my darling! Isn’t she a wonder?’ Said Cat, as the swing door to the kitchen closed behind her.’
‘Yes. A woman who makes coffee. Truly a wonder.’
‘Tony! You’re just an old cynic. Isn’t he, Charlie?’
‘Indeed, sir.’
‘We’ve just been chatting with the Dragon Concierge, how are things going on that front?’
‘Oh, ask Annabella, she deals with all that side of things.’
‘Cat, why are we here?’
‘I had a notion. An annual knockout golf tournament.’
‘Ah! Correct me if I’m wrong, but such a proposal has been discussed on a number of previous occasions. As I remember, the general consensus has been that since it’s a small club where everyone plays everyone else several times a year, leading to everyone knowing where everyone else stands in the rankings, such a tournament is somewhat superfluous.’
‘Yes, but things have changed since the new improved spa.’
‘Really?’
‘There’s been an influx of new playing members.’
‘Mainly women.’ Added Charlie.
‘Go on.’
‘And somewhat fitter than your average male.’ She continued. ‘Even Ada Armitage is forever asking me to loosen her up so she can improve her swing.’
‘Good god!’
‘We want a genuinely open, mixed tournament.’ She asserted.
‘Have you told him yet?’ Cat said.
‘Told me what?’
‘Well, er, the thing is...’ She hesitated.
‘I’ll tell him! Charlie has been dragged, kicking and screaming, by popular acclaim, into becoming chairperson of the new Sports and Spa Committee.’
‘Excellent! So, what do you need me for?’
‘My idea, to help market the whole thing, is that part of the tournament should be pro-celebrity.’
‘But we don’t have any professionals and we certainly don’t have any celebrities, unless you count Buffy or Charlie here, neither of whom play!’
‘Yes, but Buffy has met everyone. And like many politicians he’s a bit star-struck. We were rather hoping you could see your way to persuading him to head up the organising sub-committee and thereby draw in celebs for the climax of the whole show.’
‘Sure, no problem.’
‘What, just like that, no quid pro quo?’ Charlie interceded again.
‘No. Except, perhaps the proceeds of such an event should go to our favourite charity. And, you must get Fiona working with Buffy, tv rights and all that kind of thing.’
Then the coffee arrived.
After twenty minutes or so of polite coffee conversation and having turned down the offer of a refill - I was after all under the beady eye of Sparkwell - I said; ‘Well, we mustn’t out stay our welcome...’
‘Alistair, darling, you must tell Anthony your news, you can’t let it slide any longer.’
There then occurred one of those emotional moments, where because the initiator adopts the stiff upper lip, you find yourself doing the same; ‘Bad news I’m afraid old man,’ he said, standing up and offering an out-stretched hand; ‘I fear I must resign, as your aide-de-camp.’
‘Oh no, surely not,’ I replied, getting to my feet and accepting his hand; ‘It’s been nigh on forty years, man and boy. What’s happened?’
‘My folks are no longer at the castle. Luckily, they’re together in a care home, but father they say, has only a matter of weeks.’
‘When you see your father next, please convey my thanks in whatever way you can, happy carefree days and all that.’
‘Of course, but you and Charlie must visit, there’ll be the investiture first, then the wedding.’
‘Investiture?’
‘Yes, one doesn’t automatically take on title, the monarch must grant it anew.’
‘Good lord.’
‘Technically, I think on father’s death, the castle reverts, so the ceremony is all about the throne of Scotland walking out of it, and me walking in! We’ll see to it that you both get invites.’
‘All in the heart of England!’
‘Absolutely. Well, we did rather take you over, alas our original ancestral land consists of half a glen, only ever seen by the most intrepid of Munro baggers, I’ve never even been there!’
‘What’s it called?’ Asked Charlie.
‘It’s only ever been known in Gaelic, no one can agree about it’s pronunciation, spelling or meaning, father still gets letters about it.’
‘He’ll be back, sooner than one might suppose.’ I said as we worked our way out of the building.
‘What makes you say that?’
‘Difficult to break the habits of a lifetime, besides the castle has been running itself for years as Cat’s folks have got older.’
‘What I don’t understand is why you accepted the job of getting Buffy onside without demanding your usual pound of flesh.’
‘Simple. It’s because it’s really no kind of job at all. I simply make one short call to Carrie and pass the task on, but take all the credit naturally.’
‘But why would Buffy accept, without you to twist his arm?’
‘Well, it will be coming from Carrie for a start, she I imagine will appeal to his vanity in the first instance, then point out he’ll be in everyone’s good books at the club, but most of all, he’s a politician, he loves to connect...’
By now we were approaching the car, Jim could be seen standing stock still and staring at it, seemingly lost in thought.
‘Oh, my god. That thousand-yard stare again.’ Said Charlie.
‘Jim! Standing in admiration I take it?’
‘It’s not the same one.’
‘No. We have two now, this is the latest edition, more or less.’
‘Four-wheel drive when required, sir?’
‘Yes, as a matter of fact I had my chauffeur here, practice a little discrete off-roading up on the Moor just the other day.’
‘Someone’s been moving the rocks, sir.’
‘I beg your pardon?’
‘In the garden, sir.’
‘Oh, I see. Any damage, soil collapsed onto the pavement, that sort of thing?’
‘No, but it looks different.’
‘I see, well if it’s all within the garden, then it’s for the residents to sort out, you can stand at ease.’
‘Thank you, sir.’
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