‘She’s left me!’
‘Who?’
‘My wife of course.’
‘Prudence?’
‘Who else?!’
‘It, er, just seems so unlikely, she’s not been in touch with me.’
‘Why would she?’
‘Well... What have you done Rory?’
‘Nothing.’
‘You must have done something, or not done something.’
‘All I did was show her the first few pages of my novel.’
‘Novel! I didn’t even know you could write; I thought Prue did all that for you.’
‘It was putting pen to paper that caused her to leg it to her sister’s, now I’ve got writer’s block.’
‘What’s the book about?’
‘A political thriller of course. Murder, mayhem and sexual intrigue at the heart of Westminster. A dastardly villain, foiled by the hero and his girl assistant.’
‘Oh, yes.’
‘Certain to be a best seller, what with all my inside knowledge and that. That’ll show her.’
‘What exactly did Prue disapprove of?’
‘She said, she accused me of sexing-up a tired old narrative copied from real life.’
‘Thought the villain was based on someone did she?’
‘Yes. A Machiavellian master of spin, who’ll stop at nothing to get to be Prime Minister. Behind the soft eyes, the soft soap and the touchy-feely approach lay a mind obsessed with power.’
‘I see. Of course, something not so different was done on tv about thirty-five years ago if I recall. Though then the PM was very much played as a Shakespearian villain.’
‘Yes, well I was still at school then.’
A moment later we were interrupted by Walpole; ‘Anthony, a word in your shell-like, sorry to intrude.’
‘My dear fellow, you look like you’ve seen a ghost.’
‘I have; I’ve been haunted for three days now.’
‘Good lord.’
‘Tell me I’m hallucinating, they’re not living here, are they? I saw him, and what was presumably his wife, coming out of our supermarket! Helene didn’t notice thank God, otherwise she’d have insisted we be sociable. It was then I thought I must be seeing things.’
‘Henry! You were carrying the state-of-the-art mobile device given you by the railway?’
‘Of course.’
‘Then why, oh why didn’t you immediately text Charlie? Why worry for three whole days until you bumped into me? I mean, the one person in the world likely to be most sympathetic, the one person even more sensitive to the whereabouts of her father than you!’
‘I didn’t want to worry her.’
‘Sparkwell KC and the mother-in-law by proxy, have been coming and going since the summer, he’s retired. They have finally settled on a property in a rather obscure corner of the county, with the aid of friend of the Trust, Thayer.’
‘So, you have the situation entirely under control?’
‘You think I’d, let the side down?’
At which point up wandered Junior Jack. ‘Grand palace you've got here Tony, Charlie about?’
‘Of course, probably rounding up committee members to serve lunch to the staff. Christmas tradition. Talking of which, Christmas Eve is members only. Who let you in?’
‘I am a member. Hah, that’s floored you. Can’t work out how I’d get in on merit rather than have you pulling the strings.’
‘I’m quite respectful of your merits John, taking over from your father as chair of the hotel company and the numerous other leisure interests, director of the railway; but here, here you need influence, two members at least who think you’d fit in, no longer one of them, but one of us.’
‘All right, that’s enough thinking time, who proposed me and who seconded?’
‘And names that would resonate with the current committee, well Charlie would fit the bill as one, the other...’
‘You can’t think can you, I always knew the day would come when I out-smarted you, beat you on your own ground. Think about it, you can let me know any time, no cheating mind.’ Then he walking away, leaving me in peace, I hoped, before lunch kicked-off.
‘Tony!’
‘Ah! The real Jack.’
‘What mate?’
‘As opposed to John who only has the nickname Junior Jack, sorry I’m being bombarded with new news today. How’s tricks?’
‘Electric buses by Christmas they said, ha!’
‘But the buses have arrived, some are on the road already being tested. I saw it on the news.’
‘Must be true then!’
‘The bus company depot is just down the road from you. They’ve put them all in the timetable on their premier routes, allowing cascading on other routes.’
‘And just a few boneshakers to be retained for filling-in, in the unlikely event.’
‘But somewhere along the line someone has cocked-up otherwise you wouldn’t look so gleeful.’
‘Just because a recharger has the capability to rapidly recharge, doesn’t mean it always does.’
‘Oh dear, and if they’re downstream of you, so to speak, and you have increased demand.’
‘It’s really about switching, phasing and timing, or something like that, so they tell me, rather than actual demand, but yes, they can’t recharge fast enough for the number of units they need to push through to meet the timetable. Very embarrassing. If you use the route passing the depot and have just got use to the clean, quiet and sweet smelling, then along comes a broken down...’
‘I see.’
‘...and that’s not the worst of it, you have the new battery trains in view on your journey more often than you might think, and have to pass the rich bastards coming out of our place, not to mention public service vehicles charging away.’
‘Lightens the heart.’
‘I’ve something else that’ll amuse you even more. Wainwright’s retiring.’
‘Retiring! She’s younger than I am, I still think of her as a hot babe.’
‘I’ll tell Charlie.’
‘Sparkwell is in a league of her own I’ll have you know, uncategor-risable.’
‘That’s not a word.’
‘It is, has been for thirty years. Anyway, they’ve not kicked her out, have they?’
‘Thirty-five years of service, full pension. Looking to consult, on the side.’
‘Then you should bury the hatchet, put her on a retainer.’
‘Not a chance. It wouldn’t be gamekeeper turned poacher, she’d be reporting back to the new lord of the manor within days.’
‘Met Mel’s Dad yet?’
‘Sure. Nice bloke, checking us out for his daughter’s sake, but respectful with it. I like that. I assumed he was a mate of yours.’
‘We were at school together.’
‘Course’ you were.’
‘Excuse me Jack, I have to find Charlie before the bun fight begins!’
I had to wander for a bit, but then turning into the corridor, I saw them. All three of them. Standing, but in a huddle nonetheless. Benson, Layton and Sparkwell. Archie seemed to be doing most of the talking, putting them straight about something. Charlie, nodding, listening, could she truly be trusted? Surely, she must be potentially, my greatest blind spot. I decided I had time to stand and stare. Let them notice me. When they did, she came over and said, conspiratorially; ‘It’s the drive-by solicitors.’
‘What?’
‘Out on the white-collar industrial estate, at the end of the motorway. And the others of course, financial consultants, administrative types. They’re the ones leading the pack over sports ground advertising. Only the middle classes can afford tickets these days, and new grounds are all out of town.’
‘Then why the hell are Bernard and Brinkley aping them, their strategy is meant to be niche marketing?’
‘Well, that’s Barney’s point. And Archie thinks we should stay traditional because AI will make, those on the make, redundant soon enough.’
I tried not to smile my satisfaction, since we were clearly being observed; ‘Why are they here today?’
‘Archie’s the guest speaker.’
‘Oh! Excellent, a man of discernment. So, changing the subject entirely, you’ve been asserting your influence I hear, and now it seems there are two people you’ve slipped passed the membership committee whilst no one was looking?’
‘Well, Barney was proposed by Archie, I just seconded him.’
‘And Junior Jack?’
‘I helped him with the form, then proposed him. Like you did for me.’
‘Who seconded him?’
‘I don’t know.’
‘We’re meant to be full-up!’
‘But what’s the point of influence if you don’t use it?’
‘Where the hell is Mackintosh when one needs him?’
‘He’s got his own manor to run.’
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